Tyler Hilton - Missing you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwsT9qNW2vs

What a song....

What a voice...

Once upon an october...

It doesn't feel right when you have the tittle but can not write anything about it, does it? I don't know about you but this is what has just happened to me. I wanted to write something nice, maybe a cute story, but I'll end up writing about God knows what...

Something like: This october I started going to the university...first year! See?!...Life is usually about getting to know an amount of people, and by the time you think you know them quite well, you become friends and you do several activities or just work with them....you have to go...you have to move out in another city, you get a promotion, you go to university someplace else! Things like this always happen...And then,maybe you end up alone, at least until you get to meet someone who can partly fill the emptyness the others have left.

I didn't leave the city I live in...I have my friends, my family with me...but others have left it. They left me here, they left their families...I wonder where did they get the courage from?! Because I couldn't leave! Maybe I'm just a coward little girl, afraid to let go of what I've built home!

These are just some thoughts that ran through my mind....once upon an october....

Maybe many more to come!

A trecut si vara!

Cu toate ca multe alte persoane au zis-o inaintea mea, iar eu am continuat sa neg lucrul asta, am ajuns sa spun si eu: "A trecut si vara asta!"...din pacate. Nu ca as fi apucat eu sa fac prea multe, sa calatoresc sau sa ma flexez in spatele blocului, asa cum faceam in anii trecuti...toata vara am petrecut-o intr-o piata...de flori! Bine...nu pe gratis, dar totusi...o vara intreaga (dupa bac), o vara in care puteam sa merg pe strand, sa ma balacesc toata ziua....si totusi nu regret..mi-am facut prieteni, am ras (ca nebunii)....mai cateva zile...si gata si lucrul.

Si incepe faculta...si ce se va mai intampla vom vedea atunci!

Nah sara bună....

Pe cum citeam eu blogul lui Miştotică al nostru...(http://mistotica.wordpress.com/) şi râdeam cu lacrimi la ce îi poate debita creieraşul neodihnit (sau aşa susţine el), mi-am dat seama totuşi ce înseamnă (cât de cât) - pentru el - o zi din viaţa lui, dar care pentru noi pare atât de amuzantă (cel puţin pentru mine), dar nah...În fine...

Bă frate..eu l-am cunoscut pe al nostru Muciulică pe forum-ul Radioului 21 (reclamă pe faţă, "ai nău"), şi se dădea el mare grandoman pe acolo, cu niste replici de-ţi venea să taci. Oricum, cei care-l cunoaştem ştim că este un egocentrist convins, de o lene inconfundabilă, de un psihic pus sub semnul întrebării (in sensul bun şi nebun :D) şi de un calm (câteodată) de te enervează la culme!

Bine, faptul că a vrut să-l ia la bătaie pe papiţoiul de la Vodafone e un exemplu nedemn în cazul calmului său, dar hai să nu exemplificăm :D.

Mirculică e genul de persoană, care, dacă vede că nu eşti în apele tale, te ajută să îţi revii...asta dacă ii dai ocazia! (sau dacă e chiar curios de ce ai!). Nu , nu-i fac altar, dar dacă eu consider că asta-i o metodă de a-mi arăta gratitudinea pentru momentele în care mi-a fost alături, pe lângă toate celelalte persoane.

Şi încă ceva...Mirciule...de ţi-i se urcă la cap, ne supărăm!!! :))

P.S.: Avand in vedere commentul ce mi-i l-a lasat, este de un narcisism irecuperabil!!!!!

Şi plouă, plouă, plouă peste inima mea....

La un moment dat, în viaţa fiecărei persoane, trebuie luată o decizie...o decizie ce poate-i va afecta starea atât fizică cât şi psihică...de ce trebuie luate astfel de decizii?

Un lucru atât de mic....poate schimba totul...ce mizer! Detaliile odată irelevante, azi şi-au atins relevanţa maximă! Şi când te uiţi în urmă....bineînţeles: "Trebuia să..."...

Nu trebuie să mă înţelegeţi...nici eu nu mă înţeleg....sau poate mă înţeleg, dar nu trebuie să ştie nimeni....nimeni...

Şi din nou..rămâne o întâmplare...un regret tardiv... o imagine teribilă a ceea ce va fi... o amintire a ceea ce a fost....un lego a ceea ce ar fi trebuit sa fie....numai că de această dată...una din piesele de lego...s-a pierdut şi nu o vei gasi nici tu, nici eu, nici nimeni!

3 zile...

Atat a mai ramas...din tot ce a fost...va mai ramane o festivitate...o garoafa, si-o diploma....vor fi amintiri, suspine....albume....si-o filmare....

Imi va fi dor....de tot ce-a fost..de tot ce nu a fost..de voi, de noi, de mine, de tine..de tot ceea ce am reprezentat NOI 4 ani de zile....

Felicitari promotia 2008-2009...time to go...

Gonna miss you guys!!!

:))

Ea e femeia...

ea e femeia pe care el si-o doreste doar o noapte si tu toata viata, iar a doua zi el o doreste toata viata si tu doar pt o noapte

ea e femeia care stie sa rada chiar si atunci cand sufletul ii plange

ea e femeia pe care ti-e frica sa o iei in brate ca sa nu o ranesti dar pe care o ranesti pt ca ti-e frica sa iubesti

ea e femeia pe toti o arata cu degetul dar toti o vor

ea e femeia de care ti-e dor dar pe care nu vrei sa o mai vezi

ea e femeia dupa care tu  plangi atunci cand esti cu cealalta

ea e femeia care nu zice nu

ea e femeia care are grija de tine atunci cand nu te astepti

ea e femeia care te iubeste in tacere

ea e femeia care se bucura pt reusitele tale si sufera pt esecurile tale fara ca tu sa iti dai seama

ea e femeia pe care ai pierdut-o atunci cand ai incercat sa o castigi

ea e femeia pe care o strigi noaptea in vis fara sa vrei

ea e femeia pe care o urasti ca o iubesti atat de mult

ea e femeia care stie sa te aline

ea e femeia care poata sa faca totul motivata doar de faptul ca existi

ea e femeia care nu se lasa cucerita de o gramada de bani ci de o gramada de sentimente

ea e femeia al carui zambet nu il poti uita si ale carei lacrimi te-au marcat pe viata

ea e femeia in care gasesti mereu un copil de care sa ai grija dar e destul de matura incat sa se descurce singura si sa stie ce vrea de la viata....

ea e femeia de care ti-e dor chiar si atunci cand e langa tine

ea e femeia pt care totul nu e de ajuns

ea e femeiea pt care ai face orice dar de care iti este frica

ea e femeia visurilor tale dar tu alegi sa stai langa alta

ea e femeia ce te iubeste neincetat

ea e femeia ce iti stapaneste gandurile

ea .... 

 

Gri!

Plâns de cobe pe la geamuri se opri,

Şi pe lume plumb de iarnă s-a lăsat;

„I-auzi corbii” ─ mi-am zis singur... şi-am oftat;

Iar în zarea grea de plumb

Ninge gri.

Ca şi zarea, gândul meu se înnegri...

Şi de lume tot mai singur, mai barbar,

Trist cu-o pană mătur vatra, solitar...

Iar în zarea grea de plumb

Ninge gri.

(George Bacovia, Gri)

poems...

Firul de sânge care-mi iese din buzunar

firul de lână care-mi iese din ochi

firul de tutun care-mi iese din urechi

firul de flăcări care-mi iese din nări

Tu poţi crede că urechile mele fumează

dar oamenii au rămas ţintuiţi în mijlocul străzii

pentru că în noaptea asta se vor vopsi în negru toate statuile

şi va fi insomnia mea aceea pe care o vei cunoaşte

o insomnie oarecare de cretă şi de argilă

o insomnie ca o sobă sau ca o uşe

sau mai bine ca golul unei uşi

şi în dosul acestei uşi vreau să vorbim de memorie

vreau să mă miroşi ca pe o fereastră

vreau să mă auzi ca pe un arbore

vreau să mă pipăi ca pe o scară

vreau să mă vezi ca pe un turn

(Gellu Naum, Oglinda oarbă)

De-abia plecaseşi. Te-am rugat să pleci.

Te urmăream de-a lungul molatecii poteci,

Pân-ai pierit, la capăt, prin trifoi.

Nu te-ai uitat o dată înapoi!

Ţi-aş fi făcut un semn, după plecare,

Dar ce-i un semn de umbră-n depărtare?

Voiam să pleci, voiam şi să rămâi.

Ai ascultat de gândul cel dintâi.

Nu te oprise gândul fără glas.

De ce-ai plecat? De ce-ai mai fi rămas?

(Tudor Arghezi, De-abia plecaseşi)

Când stai în tren şi pleacă trenul vecin,

De ce ai impresia că ai plecat

Tu?

Primăvara şi toamna

Te tot uiţi pe cer, pierdut în gânduri,

Stoluri de păsări vin,

Stoluri de păsări pleacă,

De ce ai impresia că mergi tu?

Toată viaţa m-am uitat pe fereastră

Pironit într-un colţ

De autobuz, de tren, de vapor

Hurducat de căruţă

M-am uitat cum fug de mine copacii,

Oameni, oraşe, continente

De ce sunt copleşit de atâtea emoţii,

De ce am impresia că am cunoscut lumea?

(Marin Sorescu, Pleacă trenul)

We learn both through studying and through the experience that life gives us!

Since childhood, we spend our lives sitting in some school desks, four, five, six, seven hours a day, drawing lines, learning the ABC, trying to be the best in all that we can. As years pass by, we learn more and more things, we get involved in many extra-curricular activities, trying to make our school life as easy and as joyful as it can be.

Day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year, as we grow up, we start to think of other things than just how to get good marks or to impress ourselves with how good or bad we actually are. When we reach adolescence, our feelings start taking attitude, we fall in love, we make many friends with whom we go out and have fun.

In this part of our life, school can not interfere. Although we learn many things in school, it does not teach us how to love. This chapter of our lives is teached and learned by ourselves, and if something goes wrong...well...that is where experience gets involved.

From all the things we are being taught in school, some are let outside for experience to teach us. It is said that experince is the worst teacher of them all in one's life, because, at first it gives you the test, and then it teaches you the lesson. For example, in a relationship, you know what to avoid, but at some point, you make a mistake, and only after you suffer the consequences, you learn that you shouldn't have said or done what you did.

Once we finish school and face real life, we get to realise that what we've learned in theory is much harder to put into practice. We have to make our way through life, and try to avoid hitting the walls that surround us, so that the pursuit of happiness is much easier.

That is why, we learn both through studying and through the experiences that life gives us.

Delaying misery...

Once upon a time there was this little girl..trying desperately to convince herself that...one day...a prince in shining armour would come and rescue her from all that's bad in her life..They would run away...and live happily ever after...Cute story, right?

Well...in the real world, none of this can happen...These stories were created, for us, children like me, to imagine that one day, they would be able to live the story, or rewrite it the way they wanted to, but as similar as possible to the original one! 

But who lived a fairytale? I know I didn't...Have you? If you did, congratulations...but don't give us the recipe..Our Prince Charming will show up one day..The day our misery has reached it's final point..and we'll be smiling, looking up from six feet under!

No, I am not trying to make a drama scene by writing this, but, why do good things come in short supplies? Why don't we have enough time to enjoy good things? Why do we have the tendency to waste them all? Why do we throw good this away from us, and realise that only long after we did that? Who are we to judge the judgement of others?

Who am I to judge you?

And...

Who am I, in the end, to ask all these questions?

The art of living...

Pearblossom Highway… an ordinary desert highway…but if you look at the substrate…a simple view of it, you can compare it to one’s life!

During one’s lifetime, one has to make certain decisions, certain choices…choices that will eventually change one’s life, one way or another. At some point, one has to confront oneself with problems, having to choose between moving on or stopping or just ignoring it…or one just might be prevented or advised to: “STOP AHEAD”…Would one listen? Put yourself in one’s shoes…would you listen? Would you pay attention? Would you prevent yourself from a potential crash or you would go straight ahead without caring about the sign given or shown.

Through all the misleads of life, all the left-over, through all the memories, mistakes or good deeds, a person can always find himself/herself surrounded by the good and bad that life can offer; but that good or bad depends on each person's point of view. There are plenty of examples: some want a career before family, some want love before career, some want both at the same time, and some have none. It is said that when you crave for too much, you risk getting nothing, due to your stubbornness of having everything. "Everything" is gained in time, with experience and patience, love and understanding, trust and compromise!

          Having great expectations often brings great disappointments. Putting your hopes high for something that eventually proves itself hopeless or impossible, can crash a person. They say impossible is nothing, and if that so, why is the definition of impossible so clear, so certain, and so often seen? Is this life worth all the thinking, hoping, expecting?

            I’ve heard persons saying that life is an art! Well…If life is an art, then why aren’t we surrounded by so many artists? Why aren’t out there many more who are able to say: “I was a maestro in this art called life. I carved it with my music, with the color palette of the poems I’ve lived.”

            Why have we got so many stars, but just few artists in their true meaning? And if life is an art, then why are there so many homeless people all around the world, whom fight to survive from a day to the next? Where is the art in their lives? And most important: where is the art in having a life filled and fed with illusions, hopes…and as you age…everything hides behind the curtain, which is already consumed by time …and dreams that have already fallen asleep.

            And the answer given to all these questions is that life is an art just because it’s incomprehensible, just as all arts are. There are few people who know how to appreciate what was given to them: the right to live. If we search art in shortcomings, in useless things and hours wasted on nothing, we don’t know what it is that we are searching for.  If we have something to reproach, we should reproach it to ourselves. It’s true…some are born luckier that others, but we all ought to put good use to our resources and make our own way through life. The real frustration is that life is, in the end, an art but not many of us are able to become artists. We live our lives paying attention to things that aren’t worth it, to things that shouldn’t matter.

            When you get near a crossroads, just like in David Hockney’s picture, you realize that you have to make a decision that, in the end, will lead you to maturity… which leads you to real life, real persons and real problems…through all those…try finding yourself… Taking the right way can make you blossom!

            A human being, although surrounded by a sea of people, is born and dies alone, just like a cactus in the desert, where, far away, one can see a dusty highway, forgotten by time and space!

            Unfortunately, in a world full of bad persons, good persons are becoming harder and harder to find. Although so young, us, children heading heavily towards maturity, get to see all the bad things happening around us…The way I see it…life is just a prelude of death…Whose death? The death of good? Of bad? Both? None? Who knows? ...Only one person knows, but that is not a simple person…is God!

            However, each and every one of us is just a black spot on a blank map…A map of such complexity…the map called life!

So, in the end, what is life? An incomprehensible art, consisting of dusty desert highways, crossroads, shortcomings, short lasting happiness, lack of attention… But great landscapes! 

Viata..intr-adevar o arta?

Cel putin asta sustine profa mea de romana: "Viata este o arta!".

Pai daca viata este o arta, atunci de ce nu intalnim atatia artisti? De ce sunt atat de putini cei care se uita in urma si spun: "Am fost un maestru in aceasta arta a vietii. Am sculptat-o pe muzica mea, cu paleta de culori a poeziilor traite!"...

De ce avem atatea vedete, dar atat de putini artisti in adevaratul sens al cuvantului? Si daca viata este o arta..de ce avem atatia oameni fara un acoperis deasupra capului, care se lupta sa traiasca de pe o zi pe alta? Unde e arta in vietile lor? E o arta oare sa cauti in tomberon dupa un colt de paine, uscat si mucegait, sperand ca poate o sa iti ajunga pana maine cand-poate- o sa gasesti altul?

Unde e arta in a sta intr-o banca 6/7 ore din zi..intr-un sistem de invatamant deficitar, unde ti se predau materii inutile pentru viitorul tau (unele)?

Dar mai ales....unde e arta in a avea o viata plina de iluzii si sperante...si pe masura ce inaintezi in varsta...acestea sa se ascunda in spatele unei cortine, aceasta la randul ei.. mancata de vreme...si vise adormite...

E viata, intr-adevar, o arta?!

Expectations...

Everyone has them...once in a lifetime we all feed ourselves with them!

But do expectations have the same meaning as dreams, or high hopes? Makes you wonder...makes me wonder..makes me wonder what I really want or need....Is this life worth all the thinking, hoping, expecting?

Once you grow older, things change..conceptions change, you evolve...but sometimes evolution isn't the key..

While writing this, I realised that I started with expectations and ended up talking about my opinions of life...I don't know if I'm the one who should talk about life...In my eyes, I'm still the child that hopes that Santa or the Easter Bunny would remember me...But hitting your head against some walls usually wakes you up!

Maybe I don't want to embrace reality..or maybe I'm just a naive dreamer, having high expectations!

Interesting quote...

Dupa cum ati putut observa, pe partea dreapta a paginii de blog, apar anumite quote-uri..each day another one...

Cel de azi mi se pare in primul rand amuzant, si in al doilea rand..adevarat!

"Women really do rule the world. They just haven't figured it out yet. When they do, and they will, we're all in big big trouble."

Nu, nu tradez "rasa"...dar imaginati-va doar ce ar insemna ca toata puterea sa fie concentrata in mainile si mintea unor femei...We would be in deep shit!!!

Totul ar tinde spre lacrimogen, exagerare, culori pastelate si in special...how can I say this?...Many cases of stupidity!!!

Da stiu, "we haven't figured it out yet"...Dar totusi...we love having the power..we love the idea of controling everything, and we have the tendency of keeping everything in order...BUT (there's always a "but")...ce ne-am face daca chiar ar fi sa realizam ca zicala "In spatele unui barbat puternic, se afla intotdeauna o femeie!" e adevarata?! Reactie in lant: "Stiam!", "Stiam asta deja!"...We sometimes have brain power..but still...men have the physical power...si in fond si la urma urmei, tot ei ne ajuta cand dam de necaz si nu stim incotro sa o apucam, asa cum si noi ii ajutam, asta cand ne este permis, sau suntem mame (atunci nu au incotro)!

Nu, nu ridic barbatul pe un piedestal, ci tind sa cred ca noi, femeile, nu ne-am "descurca" mai bine fara barbati, asa cum barbatii nu se descurca mai bine fara noi!

I'm so tru...my life sux 2!!!!

Mboon....I'm not that tru, dar totusi ma consolez cu ideea! Trebuie sa ma laud, da imi place sa stau pe intuneric, doar sunt in Cosmote (CoCoSte) (tradez specia, am si reteaua rosie, adik Vodafone) :D:D...acuma vedetzi de ce sunt tru?! :D Anyway....pe cand stateam eu si vanam molii in dulap cu bricheta (nu mai aveam baterii la lanterna fara beculetz), am avut o revelatzie..un moment de...luciditate (mint!!!!)...in sperantza ca mi-a disparut blondul din cap (nu dispare niciodata, se ascunde doar sub un strat de vopsea, care nici macar nu e vopsea, ci doar un nenorocit de sampon, ca am ramas fara bani de bilet)..si am ajuns sa gandesc!!! Ain't that somethin`?! Anyway, revenind la sticla de pepsi...cum stateam eu in intunecimea intunecimilor intrerupte de flacara brichetei care aproape ca dadea foc la hainele din dulap (nici macar molii nu am mai gasit, my life sux :((((((( )...ma gandeam la specimenele din ziua de azi....le vedem in fiecare zi pe strada...logic, si ceilalti ne cred pe noi specimene, dar cik noi nu ne prindem, si ne continuam viatza, facand misto de cei din jur :D...ok..sooo....

Acesti oameni minunatzi, care ne inconjoara zi de zi de zi de zi...and so on..sunt la fel de ciudati ca si mine..ca si tine..mai ales ca si tine si ca si mine (eu care am scris aceasta.."capodopera", si tu care ai rabdare si nervi sa o citesti :D, in sperantza ca inspre final, macar, vei citi ceva interesant! Crede-ma, te insheli amarnic!)...

Oricum..trebuie sa ne bucuram si sa fim recunoscatori ca traim intr-o tzara atata de binevoitoare, si de darnica si interesata de concetatzenii ei, sa ne bucuram zi de zi de aerul poluat care il respiram, si de scoala infecta in care invatzam, intr-un sistem de invatzamant deficitar, unde profesorii vor doar majorari si sa enerveze in continuare elevii..care la randul lor, vor o scoala lejera, alocatii mai mari, teme putine sau mai bine zis deloc...si vacantze prelungite de greve...

Hope dies last, my friends..and we shall die hoping!!! Cause hope never dies...

Cum spune si statusul meu actual, citat de Emil Cioran: "Cred in salvarea umanitatii, in viitorul cianurii!!"

So..be happy my friends!!! We have so much to live for!!!

(This is me being ironic!!)

See ya soon, hopefully!